We have been doing “animal work” in Movement class. We were to pick an animal we could observe for long periods of time, answer a lot of questions about and then eventually pretend to be. Having grown up in the zoo I have been around all kinds of exotic animals. We raised lion and tiger cubs in our house, had snakes and deer as pets and fed our watermelon rinds to the hippos on hot summer nights. But in keeping with the spirit of the exercise, I decided to use my poor old cat Newman.
Newman is about twelve years old but has acted like an angry old man for years. He is scared of everything and everyone, sleeps all day and night, hates strangers and does not move very far from my side of the bed. He is quirkier than any person I know.
The first day we did this in class, I was afraid that my teacher would flunk me since all Newman does is sleep, completely buried under the coverlet. I hid on my yoga mat under my raincoat, curled up “asleep” most of class. That was a good class! Eventually, I had to move around but would slowly return the mat often. On the third day we had to keep the essence of the animal but walk on two legs. Then we became fully human but kept that essence. At first, I was thinking about the way I walked and carried myself as his essence, but I tried to go deeper. As I thought of this, I returned to a thought I have had many times while attending college.
We are at the mercy of the professors. If they tell us to quack like a duck, we do, literally! While I have walked around campus blindfolded or crawled around on a filthy old gym floor, pretending to be a cat, I have often wondered if the professors were watching and chuckling to themselves. Sometimes I see the value in these things for us as students, sometimes I see how the teachers could just be messing with us! Either way, it is more interesting than sitting home watching TV and eating bonbons!
Yesterday, we had to do a monologue, any monologue, keeping the essence of the animal. I have a monologue that is my “go to” but I decided to use the one from my Acting 2 class, one I have done twice in that class and bombed on both times! Something about that class, the room we are in and this monologue, make me freak out. But the whole reason I went to school was to face fears so I decided to use that piece for this exercise.
After our warm up and a few minutes getting our animal in our minds and bodies we all piled up against the wall of the gym and we were instructed to stand at the free throw line one by one to do our best with this. We were to be in progress, not perfect. He asked for volunteers and I was ready. Someone beat me to it but I went next. I thought about my cat and in that moment, looking at the brick wall above everyone’s head, I leaned my head from side to side, like Newman does when he is inspecting something. And it hit me- Newman is a weak, lazy, stiff old man but when he wants something he can be very strong. He head butts or pushes when necessary. He can jump higher than any of us could with ease. He is inherently tough.
I began the monologue and I was scared and weak and distraught, but also tough. When I got to the part where I say I had “done all of the mourning I could possibly do and now I just want my life back” I felt the tears well up in my eyes. When I delivered my last line I felt the underlying anger. And I felt a very rare thing for me in one of these classes- satisfaction.
I have complained about being so busy in my last few posts. Not complained actually, even though no dinner for weeks and no sleep are not things I enjoy. But I know that after next week, things will calm down. And everything I am doing, I love to do! It doesn’t change the fact that I am tired and hungry!
Today I went to school, ready for back to back classes, a meeting with Stephonn about our BFA project, another class and then rehearsal for Heartbreak House, stumbling through the whole play! And I did not have “Pablo Cruise” rehearsal so I could stay and enjoy the process and get notes. I could talk to people after rehearsal and fellowship with my cast mates a bit instead of running out as fast as possible.
During my first class, I found out the University was closing at 11am due to the threat of bad weather. I have differing opinions about that than most people, but they did not consult me so after I received my grade and input on my scene, I wrote in my journal about it and then headed home.
I talked to my husband who was headed to the high school to get some set pieces so I met him there. Then I ran to the Summit to get a head band I need for “Pablo Cruise”. I came home, fixed lunch for Tim and I (I haven’t done that for months!) and then sat in my kitchen wondering what to do. I have lines to learn, bills to pay, a house to clean, laundry to do, plays to score and scenes to select. There is a tornado in the making and Jon has been left to do his radio show alone, so I want to listen to that (I love to hear his voice on the radio! Sorry- proud mom!)
But I just sat there., tired and in a stupor. I ended up talking to Tim about acting and the plays I am doing. I am sure he was bored with my rambling. I talked about how characters make me feel and I told him about the “Newman” experience. I showed him the head bands I had bought and asked him which one suited my character best. I talked about how much I loved the scenes where I got to be funny or physical. I talked about how I want to really explore characters and how all of my unusual life experiences have given me so much to draw from. (If anyone other than Tim ever heard all of the things I have been through and seen in my life, they would not believe it! That is why I do not share everything with anyone!)
We are all strange and wonderful creatures, my cat Newman, my family, my old friends, my new friends at school. And we all have so much to learn! Whether crawling on the floor, impersonating a cat, rehearsing a play, or watching others in the grocery store, we are all just strange creatures.
