I just watched a speech where a researcher talked about vulnerability and fear. She talked about how when we try to numb our feelings of inadequacy or disappointment we also numb the feelings of joy and love. We cover our fear with lies, to ourselves and others. We numb our pain with alcohol or drugs. We try to fix our insecurities by pretending to be perfect or trying to attain the look of perfection with new houses, cars, or even plastic surgery.
She discussed courage which she defined as different from bravery. Courage, she said, was being able to present ourselves honestly. To put ourselves out there as we really are. That is really hard and takes courage.
The main focus was on being vulnerable. My voice teacher sent me the link to this message because singing and performing depends on being willing to put yourself out there. Standing up and singing and acting is like standing there naked in a way. You are covering your body with clothes but you are laying everything else about you out there to be seen and judged. All of the talent in the world can’t make up for being disconnected to who you are and who the character you are portraying is. And you have to find yourself in that character and expose yourself to the audience. Hiding behind who you want people to think you are and pretending won’t get it.
In our lives I think we have to be willing to fail while working hard not to. Being willing to put yourself out there knowing you will not be perfect but doing it anyway is something I have really grown in this past semester. And the more I let things go the more successful I am being. I take everything one day at a time and only do what I can for that day. So far I am getting it done that way! So I will continue, one day at a time remembering that I am enough!
